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Drooling on the Pillow

Saturday, March 05, 2005

The Same Old Song 

One of the more amusing tropes that Democrats are fond of is that the reason they keep losing is that they aren't mean enough. Republicans are vicious, lying, psychopathic, rabid, partisan, lying, soul-less, hateful lying liars. They will say and do anything to further their dreams of a fascist theocracy. Even tell lies.

Democrats are huggy sorts, who worry and fret that every pearl that drops from their lips is not only true(tm), but kind, inclusive, sensitive, warm and caring. Darn it, if only they could be a little meaner. But they can't. They're Democrats.

Those of us on Earth can testify that this is . . . good grief, I almost said 'a lie'. It's just the meanness coming out. Let's just say that if you've put on your radiation suit and clicked on Democratic Underground you probably have a different perspective on the cuddle quotient of the ascendant wing of the Democratic Party.

I'll tell you one thing that Democrats are good at though and that is staying on message. This is probably a legacy of Bill Clinton who got out of bed on message every day of his life. Once they latch onto an issue they speak as one and they speak all day long.

There are five letters to the Times today on Social Security reform. I'm not going to unpack any one of them, just say a word or two about the remarkable harmony Democrats are capable of .

Just as a chorus needs your alto and bass as well as your tenor and soprano, the letters stress different points, but every one of them you've heard leaking from a politician's mouth recently. Did you know there is No Crisis? True. Not now, since apparently everybody's happy getting $1.01 for their buck. Not in 2018 when all we have to do is start cashing our magic Geezer Bonds which are worth exactly nothing. Not even in 2042 when the magic bonds run out because all we need to do then is make some 'adjustments'. Well, I'm from Jersey, don't tell me about 'adjustments'. If my property taxes get 'adjusted' once more it's Friskies for me.

The Crisis song reminds me of a golden oldie called "Imminence'. If the nation is not on the verge of becoming one big Donner Party then you can't really say there's a crisis, can you? Just like if you don't actually glow in the dark you can't really say that a WMD threat is imminent.

The other major theme of today's letters is that it is George Bush's intention to destroy the safety net for seniors.

If only. If you've been conscious for the past five or six years and don't get that the president is (domestically) a fairly conventional politician with a slightly redder than average set of cherries then I'm afraid nothing will convince you otherwise. My momma always said you can't reason someone out of a position they haven't reasoned their way into.

Let me add a little contrapuntal element to the melody. He's trying to make it better. He's trying to find a way that will fix it for good. He's going about it incrementally, trying to find elements Democrats can agree to. He's trying to save the fundamental building block of Democratic policy making. He'll take what he can get but if the other side insists on running around with a bucket on its head flinging ordure at every contrary voice it hears we'll wind up with nothing.

If that happens my advice is to take every penny FICA doesn't suck up and buy stock in Friskies.

UPDATE: I want to clarify this post somewhat in light of a comment by Shaking Spears. It was not my intention to argue the notions of 'crisis' in relation to Social Security reform or 'imminence' in relation to the invasion of Iraq. The point I bungled is that they are equally irrelevant to the issues at hand. I'm simply observing that the Democrats try to suck the air out of an issue by tying it to an irrelevancy and pounding it into the ground. That may not be any clearer, but tomorrow's another day.
Posted by: Sluggo / 3:04 PM
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